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Comedy

The Best Episodes of ted

Every episode of ted ranked from best to worst. Let's dive into the Best Episodes of ted!

Binge this in 4h 48m•Peaking at 8.2/10

It's 1993 and Ted the bear's moment of fame has passed, leaving him living with his best friend, 16-year-old John Bennett, who lives in a working-class Boston home with his parents and cousin. Ted may

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Episode Rankings

  1. #1 Fan Favorite
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    ted Season 1 Episode 4 - Subways, Bicycles and Automobiles
    8.2/10(2105 votes)

    #1 - Subways, Bicycles and Automobiles

    S1:E4

    Ted's plan to spend Halloween with John is thwarted when Blaire forces him to be her designated driver for the night. Susan tries to cheer John up by finding him a new friend.

    Director:Seth MacFarlane
    Writer:Jon Pollack

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  2. ted Season 1 Episode 7 - He's Gotta Have It
    8.2/10(1916 votes)

    #2 - He's Gotta Have It

    S1:E7

    As the end of the school year approaches, Ted plots to help John lose his virginity after John learns he is the last virgin in school.

    Director:Seth MacFarlane
    Writers:Paul Corrigan, Brad Walsh

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  3. ted Season 1 Episode 1 - Just Say Yes
    7.9/10(2605 votes)

    #3 - Just Say Yes

    S1:E1

    When Matty makes Ted go to school with John, Ted immediately decides to get expelled.

    Director:Seth MacFarlane
    Writer:Seth MacFarlane

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  4. ted Season 1 Episode 5 - Desperately Seeking Susan
    7.9/10(1941 votes)

    #4 - Desperately Seeking Susan

    S1:E5

    Blaire convinces Matty and Susan to let Ted act as their marriage therapist. After the session, Ted, John and Blaire encourage Susan to pursue the career she abandoned long ago.

    Director:Seth MacFarlane
    Writer:Seth MacFarlane

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  5. ted Season 1 Episode 2 - My Two Dads
    7.7/10(2289 votes)

    #5 - My Two Dads

    S1:E2

    Ted and John's plan to exact revenge on the school bully inadvertently puts them in a parental role. Matty agrees to get a colonoscopy… on one condition.

    Director:Seth MacFarlane
    Writers:Paul Corrigan, Brad Walsh

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  6. ted Season 1 Episode 3 - Ejectile Dysfunction
    7.7/10(2082 votes)

    #6 - Ejectile Dysfunction

    S1:E3

    Ted and John go to extraordinary lengths so that John can watch his first adult film. Matty and Susan's disappointing night out leads Susan to question their relationship.

    Director:Seth MacFarlane
    Writer:Dana Gould

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    The 20 WORST Episodes of ted

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  7. ted Season 1 Episode 6 - Loud Night
    6.7/10(2693 votes)

    #7 - Loud Night

    S1:E6

    Matty's unorthodox Christmas wish is granted, completely upending the Bennett family dynamic. A trip to church gets John and Ted wondering about Ted's miraculous origin.

    Director:Seth MacFarlane
    Writer:Julius Sharpe

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Best Episodes Summary

"Subways, Bicycles and Automobiles" is the best rated episode of "ted". It scored 8.2/10 based on 2105 votes. Directed by Seth MacFarlane and written by Jon Pollack, it aired on 1/11/2024. This episode scored 0.0 points higher than the second highest rated, "He's Gotta Have It".